


Day #4: Cookies

by Accal1a



Series: December Nickels Insanity [4]
Category: Cut & Run - Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux, Sidewinder Series - Abigail Roux
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, References to Team Sidewinder, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-02 17:12:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16791214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Accal1a/pseuds/Accal1a
Summary: Kelly attempts to bake for Nick with disasterous results.





	Day #4: Cookies

Kelly had been cursing for over half an hour.

He'd cursed the kitchen, cursed the cookware, cursed the ingredients, and had finally got to the point of cursing the lineage of the eggs he had been holding.

Fuck baking.

It had been a great idea in theory. Nick had said that the one thing he missed about going to see his family over Christmas was his mother's cookies, so Kelly had intended to make some for when Nick arrived home from his last day of work before the break. 

It really _had_ been a great idea.

Except now he was standing in the middle of the Fiddler's kitchen, four batches of cookies in various states of 'not good enough' sitting mockingly on the countertops, flour in his hair, an egg broken on the floor where it had fallen after batch two (three?) and hadn't cleaned up.

He didn't know how Nick made cooking so easy, couldn’t fathom how following a recipe to the letter meant that the output wasn't what the recipe promised, didn't understand how going out for a different brand of ingredients in case he had failed at shopping the first time had caused the same failed result.

He ran his fingers through his hair again in frustration, tugging slightly before taking a deep breath and starting again.

~~~

Nick returned home from work to a completely silent Fiddler, which had his training kicking into gear almost without him realising. He pulled his gun and slowly traversed the deck, clearing the areas of his home as he did so.

His gun lowered when he saw Kelly sitting in the kitchen, his legs pulled up, forearms resting on his knees and head bowed.

"Kels?" Nick asked, putting his gun on the countertop before crouching in front of his fiancée. 

Kelly didn't look up for a moment, long enough that Nick said his name again. When he did, he apologised.

"I'm so sorry, Nicko."

Nick looked around the kitchen, trying to parse the words with the carnage around him. "It's okay Kels, we can clear it up. No harm done."

Kelly huffed out a wordless growl and got to his feet so quickly Nick nearly lost his balance. He caught himself with a hand on the floor behind him and then stood too. He rested against the countertop, letting Kelly pace. There was no point in catching him when he had this level of energy, you just had to let him walk (and then talk) it out.

Nick waited patiently for Kelly to slow his strides, then moved out of the kitchen area and gathered him up in his arms. Kelly clung to him, mumbling into his neck words that Nick couldn't understand.

"Kels?" Nick said softly, moving them towards the living area and settling his arm around Kelly's shoulder, holding him tightly.

"I wanted to make it Christmas for you." Kelly said softly.

Nick couldn't help the tinge of laughter and the very real tone of confusion in his voice. "What?"

Kelly looked at him and when Nick could see his eyes were glassy, his laughter died instantly.

Nick reached out a hand and took Kelly's cheek in his hand, stroking him gently. "What's wrong?"

Kelly sighed, closing his eyes and swallowing in the way Nick had seen him do hundreds of times before. It was what Kelly did when he was trying not to cry.

"You're kind of scaring me, Kels." Nick said, not stopping the soothing stroke of his thumb across his partner's cheek and the solid arm around his shoulders.

"It's stupid." Kelly finally said, a watery tone to his voice.

"No, it's not." Nick replied immediately. Anything that had made Kelly sad was important, and anything that Nick could do to assuage that sadness was important too.

"I wanted to…fuck. Do you remember when you told us about your dad? We were in that horrific village in…"

"I remember." Nick cut in. 

They had all been there, it was after Kelly had been with the team for a while; and Owen and Digger had joined fairly recently. They had been sitting around waiting for some mission or another and he'd just been hit with a desire to let his new brothers know about his past. He would bleed and die for these men and he wanted them to know where he'd come from. He didn't know why. 

They had ended up all sharing stories of their past, the things that made them who they were, that had forged them into the men they were today. After that, the group seemed to have a stronger cohesion, one the top brass had loved and used to great effect. Sidewinder knew what each other was fighting for after that, and the desire to get each other home from hell and back to their lives was total. They'd get each other home or they'd die trying.

"You told us that the one thing you missed from home was your mother's cookies," Kelly said, "and I tried to give you that home…but I couldn't fucking do it. You don't get to have a proper Christmas." 

"Kels.."

"No, Nicko. Don't." Kelly replied, a harsh tone to his voice. "Who the fuck can't follow a recipe?"

"Kels…"

"I couldn't even do this one thing for you. After you've made me the happiest I've ever been. After you've given _me_ a home after all this time."

"Kels…"

"I'm sorry, Nick."

"Kels, look at me."

Kelly kept his eyes closed, but opened them after Nick asked him again. Two tears escaped down his cheeks.

"Cookies don't make a home. I'm so fucking lucky to have someone who would remember that and even try this. But you're my home, Kels. You've always been my home. I don't need baked goods."

Kelly gave a watery laugh. "Yeah?"

"Of course. I love you for trying, but it's okay. We can forge new memories. I don't need that anymore. I have you."

Kelly leaned in and placed an almost chaste kiss on Nick's lips. "I love you, Nick."

"I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> Come and visit the [Cut & Run Discord Server](https://discord.gg/vvy6c76) and join us as we discuss/scream about this awesome series.


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